Chapter 16: Faithful

*Four Years Later*

“What do you want for dinner James?” Constance asked as she walked into the living room. Here they were four years later and married. She had not heard much from Bryce but she had heard he was doing well and making a name for himself. James and Constance graduated high school and moved in together afterwards. She did however miss Bryce from time to time. Do not get her wrong James made her happy as well; he was funny, loving, kind, and supportive and he would do anything for her. He applied to the police academy after they finished high school; he was the third generation to go and wear the uniform. She was proud of him. 

Though she could not help think that there was something missing from their lives. She wanted a child and she knew James did too. Her womb felt empty and so was their spare bedroom. “My heart is aching James. Baby fever is starting to get to me. Everywhere I turn, I see a baby, and my friends are having babies, pregnant women everywhere it seems like.” She confessed while they cuddled on the sofa after dinner. “I know Connie. It will happen for us I promise you.” he replied. He wanted her to be a mother and he wanted to be a father. Well they tried; they tried repeatedly for the last eight months and no luck. Each time their hearts felt it. Conversations between the married couple eventually became far and in-between. They were just going through the motions. It did not help that James worked late and long hours since he was promoted. That left Constance home by herself a lot, so she would absorb herself in her painting and sketching. Deep down, they both blamed themselves for not being able to conceive. They still tried but it all seemed hopeless.  

*** 

James was in the bed passed out from his night shift so Constance decided to do some sketching. Before she could even sit down the phone rang and scared the daylights out of her. “Gee!!” she walked across the room, “Hello? Palmer residence.” she was reluctant to answer the phone to begin with. “Hey Connie.” A male voice said on the other side. The voice that made her heart skip a beat with every whisper. “Bryce? Bryce Green?” she asked. “Yea, it’s me. I got your number from a friend in town. Thought I would call to see how you were. I hope I didn’t interrupt anything.” He said. Constance was silent for a few seconds, “I’m fine. How are you?” “I’m doing pretty well actually but something’s wrong. I can hear it in your voice. Why don't we have some lunch, if you are not busy? Maybe we can talk about it?” “It’s great to hear his voice,” She thought, “Maybe I should go.” She listened to her husband’s snoring coming from the other room. Constance loved him dearly but they had been so distant lately with not being to conceive yet. “Sure. I’ll meet you at the bistro later this evening.” She replied as she hung up. “It would be nice to see him again and catch up.” Bryce has always been easy to talk to even when Constance was not willing to talk.

 He has a way of making her feel safe. They met for dinner and caught up on their lives, his years in school, her wedding, and their families. It was nice to be around him again. They finished dinner and prepared to part ways, “It was nice to see you again Bryce.” She said. “Yea it was nice seeing you too Connie. Maybe we can get together again sometime next week?” he asked. She was again hesitant, “Sure. That’s sounds great.” She went to lean in for a hug but ended up kissing him instead. That shocked both of them. She caught a cab back home and just kept thinking. “What the hell am I doing? What are you doing Constance? You are happily mar-. Okay so you’re married.” The stress of trying to conceive was getting to her and her husband. She still loved him dearly. James was sleeping when she got back home so she gently lay down next to him and whispered, “I do love you James.” 

Constance awoke to the smell of pancakes in the air. She followed her nose and found James at the stove. “Morning my Love. Sleep well?” he asked. “Yea I guess I did. You’re cooking breakfast?” she was stunned really. “What a husband can’t make breakfast for his wife once in a while? I also take offense by your comment. I can cook don’t make it sound like I’m horrible at it.” She laughed, “But you are horrible at it. The last time you tried to cook spaghetti the spaghetti came out crunchy.” She could not help but laugh. It felt good to laugh with her husband again, to talk to him really. They finished their breakfast (which he did burn) and cuddled on the sofa. It was nice to be near him again. Before they knew it they were making love like they did when they first got married. There was no pressure of trying to conceive, just love.

***  

Over the next month James continued to work late and long hours at the station, while Constance found herself constantly restocking on painting supplies. That’s all she could really do, if she wasn’t painting she was thinking about Bryce and that made her feel guilty, so she’d paint even more. It was nice to catch up with Bryce, but it was tearing her apart that she had been unfaithful to her husband. Her and Bryce had rekindled a flame that they once had. 

“What the hell was I thinking?” she asked herself as she stood on his doorstep. She took a deep breath and rang the doorbell.

 Constance was about to turn around and walk away when Bryce answered. “Leaving in a hurry?” he asked. “Um I was thinking about it.” She tried to give a chuckle but it came out horrible. “Are you okay Connie? You seem tense.” he asked. “Yea I'm okay.” she replied though you could hear in her voice that she wasn't. “Seriously though, you're not okay. What's up?” She figured the best thing to do was to just blurt it out, like ripping off a band-aid. “I'm pregnant!” she shrieked. There was a silence that filled the house completely. “I'm...I'm sorry. You're...preg...pregnant?” his eyes looked like they would pop out of his face. “Yup. I'm pregnant.” she said again. Again there was silence. “Please say something Bryce. Please.”

“Marry me. Just marry me Connie.” he couldn't even believe he just said that. “You can't be serious, Bryce. I'm already married remember. That's why this is such a huge deal.” She sat down, “We shouldn't have done this in the first place.” “Marry me Constance.” he said once more. “You can't be serious Bryce. I can't. I'm married to James. I've done enough to hurt him I can't hurt him anymore.”

“So is that it? Are you just going to end it here?” he looked down at his feet. Constance leaned towards him and gave him one last kiss. “I'll keep in touch but this is it. It has to stop.” She grabbed her keys, “I better go home. I have to tell James everything now.” Constance waved goodbye and left. Bryce was left there watching the woman he loved and his unborn child walk away. “So this is how she felt when I left.” He couldn't think of anything to say, to tell Constance to make her change her mind.

***

Constance made it back home but James still wasn't back yet. She paced the floor, back and forth. “This is a new low Constance even for you. You've sunk so low you're sitting on a couch next to the devil himself!”  “What about the devil himself?” James walked in the front door and startled her. “Oh nothing. Just talking to myself is all.” She gave a nervous chuckle. “What's up? You seem tense.” her husband asked. That's the second time she was asked that in the past hour. “Well actually. I have something to tell you honey.” Constance tried to smile but it probably came out creepy. “Okay what is it?” he couldn't help but react to her creepy smile, “You look like you’re up to something.” “No I’m not up to something. It’s just…I’m pregnant.” She felt her stomach turn. “That’s great honey!! Oh my gosh I can’t believe it.” He ran to hug her. That sinking nauseating feeling she had was getting worse and this time she was sure it was not morning sickness. “Tell him. Tell him that it probably wasn’t his.” she thought.

“We’re having a baby.” Her husband said. Constance looked at his sky blue eyes and wanted to tell him everything, instead she said, “Yup. We are having a baby, our own bundle of joy.” Constance knew she had sunk really low but the words that just came out of her mouth, she would have to live with.

***

Pregnancy for Constance was a rough time. She couldn’t get past the guilt of lying to her husband on more than one occasion. Though she loved the smile he had that was ear to ear, the fact that she was carrying the child of another man. She would get a letter from Bryce now and again; he still could not convince her to leave James. Constance didn’t want to though, her life was by James side and she would eventually have to deal with her transgressions. However, putting them off as she was doing was not going to solve anything. Things would only get worse as time went on and she knew that. “Only two more days.” James said excitedly as he prepared the baby’s nursery. They both agreed to leave the gender a surprise to the very last moment and you tell it was making James antsy towards the end. “That’s just a due date. The baby will come when he/she is ready, you know that honey.” She smiled at his enthusiasm. “I’m going to get some yogurt.” she smiled.  “Okay honey, I have to head to work. Call me if you need anything.” he yelled as he ran out the door. 

Constance tried enjoying the quiet that filled the house as she ate her yogurt. Despite how things have transpired, she was excited to be a mom; to have a little bundle of baby-joy to cradle and hold. She looked at the completed nursery, it was not much but it will do for the baby. Afterwards, as she finished cleaning the dishes, a sharp pain struck her in the stomach. “Oh great, not now, seriously not now.” She pleaded, as if that would work. That of course didn’t stop what was to come next. Constance couldn’t decide whether to go through it or make it to the phone and call James. The baby didn’t give her much of a choice.

 Constance gave birth to a beautiful and healthy baby boy that she named Cameron. She love him from the first moment she saw him and right away she could see, he had Bryce’s eyes. Her little baby boy was the most precious thing she had ever seen.  

*** 

James was a wonderful father to baby Cameron he loved that boy with all his heart and it showed. Cameron grew more and more as the time went by. Constance started to paint more and more and she stopped replying to Bryce’s letters. “I need to time to think it all through.” She’d tell herself. James was so proud of their little tike. 

“Okay say ‘ball’ Cam, say ‘ball’. Oh fine buddy. We’ll give it a rest for today.” He said as he tried to teach Cameron a few new words. The tiny tot was stubborn and James knew that. James also knew from the moment he saw his son's red hair that there was more than meets the eye. He recognized that red hair anywhere. The thought of where it came from crushed him inside. He loved that little boy more than anything. After all the difficulty of trying to conceive, they had their son.

Cameron was down for a nap when James decided to confront her wife. “Constance, there’s something I want to ask you and I want you to be perfectly honest with me. “Okay.” She said as she wiped the paint from her hands. “Is Cameron mine?” he asked before she could even put the rag back down. “Uh. Why do you ask?” she timidly asked. “Constance. I may be dense at times but I’m not stupid. He has Bryce’s red hair and everyone can see that. I guess I just want to know why.”

“She stood there not being able to say anything. “I’m sorry. I’m really sorry James, it was a huge mistake and it’s over. I just couldn't let go of what him and I had.” she told him. James took a step back. “You know I love you right? I love you and Cameron more than anything in the world. And because of that love, I’ll put this behind me. I want to raise him as our own but one day you’ll have to get the courage to tell him the truth; to tell him everything.” Constance knew he was right and she hoped they could move passed it all. James left for his night shift at the station without another word. She heard Cameron stirring and went to check on him. She sat him down to play a game, as they played she whispered to her young son as if he understood, “I hope you can forgive me for everything. Someday I’m sure you'll understand.”

Constance’s mistakes ate away at her little by little. She lived with so many regrets that she couldn’t get passed. James struggled as well, he couldn’t let go of what his wife had done and the bond that he built with his son began to fade overtime. All the while, Cameron grew up believing his parents were happy and loved each other. He would soon grow up to know the lies and deceit his parents tried to hide.   

*End of Chapter 16*